Distorting Reality

Excess Energy

Reality is smooth and flowing and flexible — until you lean into your inner or outer reality streams and assign a high importance value to something in the stream, which collapses reality around it. In that one area, you create a kind of knot or constriction and this generates an excess of energy, like friction.

This reality distortion produces many effects, and one of them is opening you to be hooked. You can look at the receptor as a kind of reality distortion, a knot in your field that distorts reality.

The friction created by the reality distortion is ultimately converted into energy that people and egregores siphon from you, to fuel their own existence and programmed goals.

Assigning a high importance value can be negative value or positive value. For instance, you can distort reality by idolizing something or by despising it. By needing something to happen or needing something not to happen. Either way, you’ve imbued a possible outcome with an exaggerated value, you’ve made something a Big Deal in a way that binds you to it, creates a dependency between you and it. You’ve collapsed that sector of the reality flow around it.

Let’s return to the nature of Receptors. The wounds and beliefs and core programs at the heart of your receptors are reality distortions. They manifest in countless ways, but in their essence you’ll find a belief/programming + a seed of excessive value placed on something.

Importance, value, Meaning, energy

Some things are important. Some things have value. Yes, I agree. In a mundane sense, this is certainly true. I’m not suggesting we float through our lives trying to convince ourselves that nothing matters.

To grasp what I mean more clearly, let’s step out of our emotional selves for a moment and visualize this not as emotional value or importance, but as energy mechanics.

Imagine playing your favorite music over speakers, and there is an old fashioned dial that controls the volume. It’s a physical dial, not a digital slider. This is a really expensive sound system in your house and you’ve got several speakers placed in the perfect locations to create an immersive sound experience.

This is not a direct experience. You are not sitting in front of the musicians, experiencing this music directly. You have this expensive, state of the art sound system set up in order to recreate the direct experience.

What happens when you turn up the volume dial past a certain value? Let’s say, for this kind of music in this kind of room, the optimal volume value is between 3-5 on the dial. When you turn that dial, every incremental increase in value introduces distortion. Eventually, if you turn the volume (or value) up to 10, the sound (reality) will be significantly distorted.

Another example is friction. Friction, within a certain range, is useful. Adding more friction wastes energy by turning it into excess heat, which can wear down mechanical parts or cause fires. Friction increases proportionately with weight. Imagine dragging one stone block along a flat surface — there is a certain amount of friction generated. Now add another block on top of that. Twice the friction. Add another, you get three times the friction.

When you imbue something with a high value, you turn that dial up to 10, causing distortion. When you attach a high importance value to something, you add weight to it, which generates more friction. See it as an energy value, rather than a feeling or emotion.

Why do we do it?

We all do this. We look out at our external projection and inject all kinds of things we see and experience with excess value/meaning, which is to say, energy.

I’ve wondered about this a lot, and I don’t have an answer I can offer with any certainty. My working hypothesis at the moment is that it has something to do with our animal nature, our physical evolution, a social mammalian trait. I have this idea that if a person is removed from contact with others, if they were to live alone out in nature for a year, this habit, this outward movement of meaning/value/energy would slow down and perhaps even cease. And it would start up again if that person re-entered the human matrix.

I speculate that when we fall asleep and lose ourselves in the outer projection, we find ourselves immersed in a sea of competing egregores, demanding we form an opinion, take a side, endorse a belief, make a commitment, feel this way or that. Egregores are always trying to shape a portion of the reality stream, and to do that, people need to attach excess energy to something in the reality stream.


You can also think of this excess value as a reflex toward attachment. What’s confusing is that people have largely equated attachment to being engaged in life. For instance, if you love someone, you will be attached to them, and the more attached you are, presumably, the more you love them. When in fact, love and attachment are two separate things.

My husband would sometimes be overseas for 6 months or even a year at a time, and neither of us felt this as a hardship. People assumed we didn’t really care about each other, because we didn’t need physical proximity to maintain our feelings of connection and closeness, and the separation didn’t make us unhappy, anxious or lonely– obviously we did not really love each other.

Nothing could be further from the truth. We loved each other deeply.  We didn’t suffer from the separation because our attachment to each other was very lightweight. Love and attachment are not the same. One does not flow from the other. Attachment is not a symptom of love.

Another example: the belief that feeling urgency and importance is necessary to overcome a high stakes challenge. If you’ve ever actually been in a life or death situation, something potentially life threatening, you know the exact opposite is true — you don’t increase your chance of survival by adding extra emotional energy to it.

Ideally, all of that special sauce you’ve been liberally slathering over your reality is suddenly completely absent and everything slows down, everything is clear and you don’t have thoughts like “I have to get that gun out of his hand or everyone is gonna DIE!!!!”

Not at all. Everything slows down. You’re not even trying to keep calm. That is unnecessary because the possibility, the idea, of freaking out doesn’t exist. You’re one with the action you take, and that is all. You add nothing to it. No urgency. No commentary. No value or meaning.

It’s like skydiving. You put on your harnesses and you practice on the ground. You practice “jumping” — then you do the starfish pose, and you count, then you go to the next action in the series, etc. You practice on the ground and it’s easy, the things you have to do are easy. There is no special urgency or attachment, there is no alarm going off in your head telling you if you don’t get this one thing right you’ll end up hurtling toward your death feeling like a stupid loser. You aren’t adding extra emotional energy or meaning to the actions you are practicing.

Once you go up in the plane and you’re waiting for your turn to jump, watching each of your fellow divers disappear out of the open door of the plane into the sky, what happens? Your ability to do the simple sequence of actions is objectively very important. But if you allow yourself to imbue them with this life or death importance, these very simple steps you practiced so easily on the ground will become difficult to execute.

You move toward the opening and you jump out. Instantly, you’re falling toward the ground at high speed. You see all the world spread out before you. Yet you are not adding any extra meaning or importance to anything, you do your actions, you’re one with your actions. No urgency, no commentary, no narrator telling you this is important.

I think you’ll agree that in this moment, the skydiver is fully engaged in life, in their outer projection, their external reality. Yet, they have not overloaded it with a sense of attachment, they haven’t burdened any of their actions or outcomes with the heavy weight of importance or urgency.

Every part of them is awake and alive and engaged in their outer projection…and yet, they are not attached to what is going on. They are not injecting opinions, meanings, value, emotion, or excess energy into any part of it.

Clearly this excess value/meaning/importance isn’t necessary to being fully engaged with life, to loving people or to taking effective action, even when there is a lot at stake. So if Life isn’t asking for it and doesn’t need it, then where is the demand for attachment coming from?

The personal egregore needs to be fed

How about your inner projection? We’re taught to believe what happens in the script, the play, the movie of our inner projection is important. Our feelings, our thoughts, our opinions, our ideals, our memories, our story, our sadness, our hurts, our needs. It’s all important. In fact, we identify with it.

The outer reality projection is full of competing egregores and the inner projection is your personal egregore, your synthetic self, your persona, your ego self. It will literally shut down and stop functioning unless it is continually fed and maintained by you and by others. The activity of this personal egregore takes place on and through the inner projection, which is just another movie.

In the outer reality stream, our big misunderstanding is believing we need to be attached, to imbue excess energy/value/meaning in order to be engaged. We don’t.

In the inner reality stream, our big misunderstanding is that we believe the movie playing in this inner projection is ourselves, we attach our identity to the story projected onto that screen and naturally we invest a great deal of energy into it. And that serves your personal egregore very well, indeed.

The inner projection and the egregore that serves as its producer and director and actor, is not bad or evil. The outer projection and the many egregores you will find there are not necessarily bad or evil. I’m making no value call on either of these projections, only inviting you to see them, and notice the ways you interact with them. The ways you place your energy into them.

Detachment is a dirty word

Various spiritual and religious teachings promote detachment, or non attachment. These teachings sound good, sure, we get it — being attached to anything ephemeral, always changing, perhaps illusory by nature, will only bring suffering.

But let’s keep it real. Who really wants to go through life detached? Vanilla or rum raisin? It’s all the same to me, I’ve conquered my attachments!

Floating around in your voluminous, drab robe (because what else would you be wearing?), with a peaceful but remote semi smile. Beyond attachment. No thank you!

Let me present another model of detachment. I approach it as energy management, similar to financial management, rather than emotional detachment.

We touched on this before, but let’s recap:

You spend money on things that you want or need and that are a good value. It’s a transaction. You know the value of your money and you know the value of the the good or service you get in exchange for it. So much of what you put your energy into in your outer reality stream has no value and gives you little to nothing in the exchange. Often you’re not really aware of the energy transaction. You don’t hold a constant awareness of the value of your energy, or what it’s for. Sometimes, if you think about it, you are aware, but in general, you forget about this as you move through your day.

In your inner projection, you pour out a staggering sum of energy into costly transactions and auto-renewing subscriptions — that you may have subscribed to years ago, or even in childhood. You buy into stories and beliefs that provide you with little to nothing of value in return  — though if you learn to pay close attention and notice, you’ll find these are all going to feed the Synthetic Self, your personal egregore. If you don’t have command of your egregore it ends up being like a very expensive, high maintenance pet!

With financial investments, you invest in things that will either give you a return over time, or in things you believe will be good and do good in the future — things you want to see grow and blossom in the world or in your life.

Looking at your energy this way: are you investing it in ways that will give you a return, or into things that you wish to nurture and grow?

In your inner and outer projections: you are either transacting (giving to get) or investing, which by its nature, binds you to the thing you’re investing in. By investing your energy, you become a shareholder.

When you really see yourself (in the center), and look out at your external movie, and then inward at your internal movie, and you see the energy transactions happening in real time, you are presented in the moment with the ability to purchase something with your energy or invest in something with your energy, thus binding yourself to it — you naturally start to practice something that very much resembles non attachment. You’re not even trying to do it, not trying to “detach” from anything, but in the moment, when you see the price tag and you see clearly what the value proposition is (or most often that there is none, or that any value goes to enrich egregores, your own or others), you will simply decline.

When you see plainly in each moment that your internal projection isn’t necessarily a representation of yourself, and that your egregore’s needs are many, but all these loud and urgent needs are in fact, not your needs, you will naturally divest from old stories, complexes, beliefs, emotional habits over time — no longer investing in them, no longer a shareholder. This will come to resemble radical non attachment, even though you never had that goal in mind.

Hooks and cords are about energy.